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Joke of the Day

"Where's the 'Alpha male' bint putting out a video that becomes famous for the line ""LEAVE JEREMY (Clarkson) ALONE!""?... In written form on every comment thread of every relative social media post."

"Did you hear about the Hipster that drowned in the canal? It wasn't mainstream."

"What do you call a big black rat that steals all your food? A Rat-Coon Hope you guys are light hearted enough to not be offended."

"I went to a dinner party for anorexics. There was an all-you-can't-eat buffet."

"Just realized my undies are on inside out .. Was gonna change them around . but I figured let the other side get sum action for a change ."

"gang leader: ""this isnt what i meant when i said go rob the store"" me: [putting 19 cartons of milk in fridge] ""you should be more specific"""

"They found a hole in the wall at the local prison The police are looking into it"

"Why is revenge a dish best served with honey? Because honey is what you find at the end of bee trails (betrayals)"

"""Um guys wait seriously you guys I feel like we should be going the other way they're shooting at us? Um guys?!"" --horses going into battle"

"How did the constipated mathematician solve his problem? Simple! He just worked it out with a pencil!"