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Joke of the Day
"Most of my workday is me thinking what my couch is doing right now."
Next Joke
"I met a guy yesterday who told me he worked as a limb stretcher. Turns out the bastard was pulling my leg."
"Sure I'll join your Cause on Facebook...Right after I jump out of an airplane without a parachute..."
"""Can I have a pound of onions please."" ""Sorry sir, it's kilos these days."" ""oh, ok, can I have a pound of kilos please."""
"I'm not a big fan of chick flicks, but my girlfriend pressured me to pick a favourite. I went with Pounds per Square Inch Love You."
"How often do I see alligators? Ocajunally"
"How did OJ respond when his son asked to borrow the car? >Only if you go aks your mother."
"Why does your blood rush to your head when you're upside down but not to your feet when you're right side up? Your feet aren't empty."
"What does a man with a 12 inch penis have for breakfast? this morning I had bacon and eggs."
"Last night I was with a girl... ...she told me she wanted me to give her 9 inches and make it hurt. So I fucked her 3 times and punched her in the jaw."