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Joke of the Day
"Can't we just sit and drink somewhere until they build a bar around us?"
Next Joke
"What do you call an Australian who's prejudiced against grains? A riceist. (It sounds better when you say it aloud)"
"I was feeling very depressed the other week. I went to my psychiatrist and told him I was suicidal. He asked me to pay in advance."
"Starlord: Galaxy. Superman: Earth. Spiderman: NYC. And then there's Daredevil micromanaging the shit out of 10 blocks in midtown Manhattan."
"A double-amputee walks into a bar Then he remembers he's already legless and walks out again."
"Knock knock. Who's there? Underwear. Underwear who? Underwear my baby is tonight?"
"Have you ever gone camping with Crohn's disease? Shits in tents."
"My doctor wrote me a prescription for dailysex, but my girlfriend insists it's for my dyslexia"
"TIFU by accidentally benching our star player on the last inning... Whoops, wrong sub"
"*phone rings Me: Hello? Telemarketer: Hello how are you today? Me to son: Come here baby, SpiderMan is on the phone!"