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Joke of the Day
"Life is like a box of chocolates. My wife won't let me have any."
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"Honestly, Officer, I wouldn't have pulled over had I known you were just going to criticize me"
"What do you call a literary fish? Salmon Rushdie!"
"Charles Dickens walks into a bar... and orders a martini. The bartender asks ""olive 'er twist?"""
"Why would Gabe Newell be a better world leader than Hitler? There'd be no World War 3."
"Ever had that feeling where you just want to jump right out of bed? Me neither."
"I like my women like I like my steak Dead"
"What do you call 6.022 x 10^23 avocados? A guacamole."
"TIL, over 23% of jokes on /r/jokes are just ripoffs of previous ones Whooooops... Wrong sub( )"
"How to you make a Hormone? You kick her in the groin."