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Joke of the Day
"If your toilet paper roll is on the wrong way, I'll fix it and then never come over again."
Next Joke
"Bad Zoo I went to a one time and the only animal there was a dog. It was a shih tzu."
"Blah blah blah employee handbook, just get to the point where you say if you're gonna drug test me or not"
"Purell is 99.8% effective in reminding you about your paper cut."
"I lost 20 pounds in England last summer. How much is that in American dollars?"
"What breaks when you give it to a twelve year old? Her hips."
"Two 5th graders are doing Math homework. One tells the other, ""I don't know what 99 is in Roman numerals."" The other lowers her glasses and says, ""IC."""
"Remember: You can eat your way out of almost any problem."
"What kind of coffee do the Islamists hate the most ? French press"
"My girlfriend accidentally shoved a pair of glasses up my ass... Now my hindsight is 20/20"