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Joke of the Day

"I never made it as a firefighter. I thought arsonists were people who hated arson, so every time we met one I thanked him for his support"

"What is green sooty and whistles when it rubs its back legs together ? Chimney Cricket !"

"At university I was going to join the debating class... ...but someone talked me out of it"

"How many honest intelligent caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes? Both of them."

"Did you hear about my cruel psychic Maths teacher called Moe who's great with a sniper rifle? He's a mean medium, Moe, with range."

"What do you call a fat lady that can tell your future? A four-chin teller"

"*tries to turn on TV* TV: I have a boyfriend"

"what will a small left boob will say to the big right boob we are not isomorphic :P"

"How does a black woman know she's pregnant? When she takes the tampon out the cotton is picked."

"Where do space monsters live? In far distant terror-tory."