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Joke of the Day

"Why couldn't the cup of tea climb flight of stairs? Because it was too steep."

"What's it called when a planet orbits its sun 8 times? An orbyte"

"What's the difference between the grocery store and a math book? In a math book I can buy 57 papayas at $1.99 each and no one will care."

"What's a baker's biggest fear? Something going a-rye while they're raisin' bread."

"UK and USA are in a contest to destroy themselves. The UK edged ahead with Brexit, but the US just played their trump card."

"So my mobile phone company forced me to upgrade my 3G phone to a 4G one. I couldn't withstand the pressure."

"Q: How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum."

"Taught a parrot to repeatedly say ""WHERE ARE YOUR GLOVES?"" and now I don't have to talk to my kids until Spring so that's pretty cool."

"I used to think love() was abstract, until you implemented it in MyHeart."

"Having sex is just like riding a bike. A strategically placed baseball card makes it sound like a motorcycle."