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Joke of the Day

"I have failed math eleventeen times or so."

"My moral compass must run on solar power, because it never seems to work after dark."

"Why is the apostrophe always near an ""s""? Because it is possessive"

"Defending why he has a dislike of gay guys... Ok look I know they're not all bad but you have to admit they hang around a lot of assholes."

"The greatest trick Facebook ever pulled was to convince the world we actually want to keep in touch with people we went to school with."

"Did you hear about the bedbug? He was undercover."

"I'm thinking about starting a feminist group. It's called Ovary-Action."

"Feminists: Look on the bright side... There will be more women in the White House than ever!"

"I just established the five hour rule for tequila spilled on the floor."

"It's a pleasure to see you and another not to see."