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Joke of the Day

"Nice try ""Enjoy By"" date on bag of broccoli, nice try."

"I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one."

"Porn is so unrealistic. There's no way a guy with a ponytail could have a house that nice."

"A guy walks into a bar He has a frog on his shoulder, the bartender says Hey where'd ya get that? The frog says it started out as a wart on my ass."

"In my opinion, One by Metallica... Is a 10/10."

"Q. How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Nobody knows, there's no light."

"What do you get when you cross a baggage handler with a sex offender? [The TSA!](http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ2-l7xEQJqvdPPlN2qABza3Hpfin65EITfmXxRgqx4gj5ajg9mEdVJFhEsjg)"

"How much does a Polar Bear weigh? Enough to lower your standards, I'm moonsout_goonsout"

"Willie Nelson's public statement regarding being caught with a bag of marijuana recently: ""It's a good thing I had a bag of marijuana. If it had been a bag of spinach, I'd be dead by now."""

"I saw a picture of myself on a milk carton once but my new family was rich so I kept my mouth shut."