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Joke of the Day

"""I have to go eat cake now"", should be a perfectly valid reason for leaving a social occasion where cake has not been provided."

"If you were a Canadian and I were a Canadian and we bumped into each other, who would apologize first? I'm not a Canadian so get out of my fucking way! I'm Walking Here!"

"What do you call the ghost of a chicken? A poultry-geist."

"What does a Muslim cowboy shout on his horse? Jee hawd!!!!!!!!!!"

"My grandmother treats me like a rock star By that I mean she lets me sign her tits"

"What type of Bees provide millk? Boobees (boobies)"

"When I die, I'd like the word Humble' to be written. .......on my statue."

"I sleep better naked...why can't the flight attendant understand this?"

"What are an idiot's last words? Hey, watch this."

"I'm old school in the sense that I always put women and children first. I mean, there could be spiderwebs."