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Joke of the Day

"If you have ever used one of those Hand Dryers in a bathroom, congratulations...you just did a portion of the Macarena....."

"me: if ur soulmate dies before u meet them do u get like a backup soulmate professor: i meant questions about the midterm"

"What do you get when you cross a donkey and a piece of onion? A piece of ass that will bring a tear in your eyes."

"Freudian analysts How many Freudian analysts does it take to change a light bulb?? Sex"

"Why fist fights break out at NASA? Sometimes an argument of perihelion will get out of hand."

"what is the cruelest joke of all? Your Life."

"How many narcissists does it take to change a lightbulb? One to hold it and the rest of the world to spin around them."

"""Can you turn down the radio? I have a phone call that's going to last the entire car ride."" - The worst people alive"

"Not only was my brother not mad when I backed into his Porsche, he even invited me camping and said to bring a shovel. Whew!"

"What song people listen to while jumping off skyscrapers? Let the bodies hit the floor by Drowning Pool."