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Joke of the Day
"I stole a futon from a shop. I think the police are after me, so I have beenlying low."
Next Joke
"[One to tell militant women]: how many women on their period does it take to screw in a lightbulb? [Meekly] ^just ^one..."
"It's not fair that women make 77 cents for every dollar a man makes... ...that only leaves 23 cents for the guy!"
"Do you know how old I am? I'm so old that I was around when the Dead Sea was just sick. (Told to me by my grandfather)"
"A classics professor goes to a tailor... ... to get his trousers mended. The tailor asks: ""Euripides?"" The professor replies: ""Yes. Eumenides?"""
"If you can take my girl, then you can have her. If I can take your girl, then you can have her too."
"A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said, Keep off the Grass.'"
"Another ""Iron Man"" Joke Iron Man is a superhero. Iron Woman is a command."
"I'm gonna make a photo editing type program that makes you look like a Hobbit and call it Frodoshop."
"I just bought the best vacuum ever It sucks"