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Joke of the Day

"Maybe It's You The debut album from the literal chorus of Taylor Swift exes. Available for download from iTunes soon."

"Donald Trump is going to outlaw shredded cheese. He's gonna make America grate again."

"My New Year's resolution was to buy a velcro wall So far I'm sticking to it"

"I went to shake the old man's hand But Parkinson's beat me to it"

"The ocean isn't shark-infested. It's the ocean. That's where sharks live. We aren't supposed to be there. Humans infest the ocean."

"Are you tired of every day being the same? Congratulations, you're an adult!"

"Have you ever shoed a horse? No, but I've told a donkey to fuck off."

"ESPN First Take - Patriots' Players Question Rex Ryan's Defense"

"""It's been months since I got laid."" - Baby chickens"

"I couldn't decide how much lettuce to buy Until someone helped me think it through. Turns out, two heads are better than one."