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Joke of the Day

"After nearly three months of trying... ...my wife just told me that she's pregnant!! She has the worst stutter ever!"

"Wife: ""Would you like to help me....?"" Translation: ""Do it or die."""

"Asked my friend from North Korea how has life been going? He said he couldn't complain.."

"I asked my Grandfather what it's like to have Alzheimer's. He stared blankly at me as he no longer remembers any of his family members or how to construct sentences."

"What do ya call an overweight Scottish pigeon .... A fat coo... Im here all week."

"I like my women the way I like my wine 8 years old and locked in my cellar"

"What's a young monkey's favorite time of the school day? Rhesus."

"Private Manning will never get away with it! Corporal Klinger didn't"

"Yo mama so fat the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!"

"Why did everyone invite mushroom to the party? Because he's a fungi."