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Joke of the Day

"Wife: ""Would you like to help me....?"" Translation: ""Do it or die."""

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"Two clowns are eating a cannibal. The first clown says to the second ""I think we're doing this joke wrong""."
"Two Scottish cows in a field, what one is on holiday? The one with the wee calf."
"Pornhub has banned submissions of the Germany-Brazil game. They don't allow rape videos."
"Did you guys hear about the new death camps in North Korea? No you didn't. You haven't heard anything. Long Live the Democratic People's Republic of Korea."
"What does it sound like when a Pterodactyl urinates? There is no sound... The P is silent."
"What's the most positive thing about Africa? HIV"
"Forget Netflix and Chill. It's time for IMAX and Climax!"
"Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow in the sky She missed"
"The Cherokee Indians are overrated. Sure, they had an advanced writing system, but Indians from Florida produced more Seminole works. ...I'll show myself out."