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Joke of the Day

"He died doing what he loved, annoying the hell out of me and not believing I would stab him."

"The baby spit up on my Xbox so I had to get rid of it... I'm gonna miss that baby..."

"answer This is too all high school teacher, What is the worst thing that you've seen your student doing?"

"How did Captain Hook die ? He wiped his ass with the wrong hand."

"Did you read the story about the man who dropped nitroglycerin? It had quite the explosive conclusion."

"After much consideration, I do not believe Wolverine in the X-Men movies is real. It's obviously just a huge act, man."

"In what town lives the mathematician who can only multiply by two? Dublin."

"What's better than winning the WNBA Championship? Taking a piss without sitting down."

"I hope the members of Chumbawmba have those Life Alert bracelets, you know, in case they finally can't get up again."

"The craziest shit happened today. Then I just wiped it away and got on with my day."