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Joke of the Day

"answer This is too all high school teacher, What is the worst thing that you've seen your student doing?"

"I hate bikes that carry two people. I can't tandem."

"What does Happy Meal and a lonely girl have in common? They both come with a toy in the box."

"Women want men they can fix; men want girls they can save; I want a sandwich that makes itself."

"When someone says, ""Good luck with that'' they actually mean ""Let me grab some popcorn so I can watch you fail."""

"I just finished a whole stick chap stick without losing it or replacing it. In case any of you women want to know how faithful I am."

"I love how coffee tricks me into believing I'm in a good mood for about 27 minutes"

"When I write too fast, my ""E"" looks like a ""G"" making this assignment sheet where I marked several projects as ""DONE"" look pretty weird."

"What concert costs 45 cents? 50 Cent feat. Nickelback Go ahead, down vote me to oblivion Edit: thanks for all the love, appreciated"

"If one drop of semen contains more life than a drop of blood, why don't vampires s*ck co*k? Oh wait, Twilight."