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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a fridge and a gay man? A fridge doesn't fart when you pull the meat out."

"<gets pulled over> Officer- What's making all that noise in your trunk? Me- My feelings. I'm trying to dispose of them properly."

"On the upside, Oscar Pistorus has had his paralympic classification promoted... ...he's gone from T43 (double below knee amputee) all the way up to T800 (The Terminator)."

"The strongest person in a prison should be called mitochondria Because they are the powerhouse of the cell."

"What happens when you mix pandas and ammonium? Pandemonium breaks out."

"What has a mouth but never speaks, Has a bed but never sleeps, And has legs but never walks? &nbsp; A mute, crippled insomniac"

"What do you call a painter with a brown finger? Picasso"

"Did you hear the one about the invisible knife? I couldn't see the point!"

"Weddings r cool bc u can cry in public about other stuff as long as u look in the general direction of the bride + groom"

"What kind of tea does an anarchist drink? Cheap generic iced tea. Because proper tea is theft."