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Joke of the Day

"Why are quantum physicists bad lovers? When they find the position, they can't find the momentum. When they find the momentum, they can't find the position."

"Losing my virginity was a lot like learning to ride my bike My dad was behind me the whole way."

"The grammar teacher said ""In English, two negatives make an affirmative, but two affirmatives never make a negative."" A student replied... ""Yeah, right!"""

"I recently joined a support group for people who peaked in high school. It's called Crossfit"

"ProTip: Make sure heated seats are off before putting your purse on them...lipstick melts."

"I met my statistics teacher at the store today... What are the odds!"

"What's the difference between my ex and the Titanic? The Titanic only went down on 1,000 people."

"Let's take a moment to thank earphones For helping us ignore stupid people all around us."

"What do you call a Jewish Pokemon Trainer? Ash"

"My college bar had a ""Blow your GPA"" drink special night until all the Asian students died..."