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Joke of the Day
"Chuck Norris has a roundhouse-kick app for his iPhone 8.0"
Next Joke
"My friends were disappointed that I decided to stay home after work instead of going out with them... I said, ""Yea, I'm really into resting, aren't I ? """
"What does a girl do to her as asshole before having the most crazy sex of her life? She leaves him at home"
"Funny that when some people go out for 'fresh air', they come back in smelling like 'weed'"
"Two guys walk into a bar... ""Ouch!"""
"Energy Drink OD = Black out and wake up in a bookstore signing copies of the book ""Part-time Boy: The Unauthorized Biography of Lady Gaga."""
"me: Should I pack condoms? wife*laughs* me*driving* wife*still laughing* me*checks into the hotel* wife*calls friend so they can both laugh*"
"Stop asking me to vote for your kid in contests. I'm too nice of a person to tell you I'm surprised you got laid in the first place."
"optimist: the glass is half full optimist - the glass is half full; pessimist - the glass is half empty; feminist - the glass is being raped."
"the next time u see a fork in the road, just try to remeber that at least, no mater wat u did, u werent the person who tried to eat the road"