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Joke of the Day
"My grandma thinks of me as a rock star... Always having me sign her tits. Takes forever."
Next Joke
"A skinny girl and an overweight girl are standing in line on Friday morning. As the Walmart manager unlocks the door, skinny girl says, ""remember, black Friday lives matter."""
"Fuck you ""string"" cheese! Don't tell me how to eat you!"
"I prayed to God for a handbag and he gave it to me It's a blessing and a purse."
"What's Dr. Dre's favorite vegetable? Beets."
"Opinions are like assholes... I'd rather not hear yours."
"What's the difference between a violin and a fiddle? A violin has strings. A fiddle has straaangs."
"[sign outside butcher shop: POLISH SAUSAGES - ASK US] ME: Yes, I'm here about the sausage polishing job?"
"What's the difference between Davey Crockett and Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels is still killing Indians."
"My house is like an Indiana Jones movie. Partly because I walk around with a bullwhip, but mostly because of all the cobwebs."