201688

Joke of the Day

"A skinny girl and an overweight girl are standing in line on Friday morning. As the Walmart manager unlocks the door, skinny girl says, ""remember, black Friday lives matter."""

"If I don't make some serious changes to my life, they'll never let me into the gates of heaven. So who can teach me how to pick a lock?"

"Why are feminists so good at Street Fighter V? Because they are always V-triggered"

"You could say I'm a Whiz Kid. I'm really smart. And I'll drink your piss"

"What did the prostitute say to the psychic? I don't do aural. You're welcome and I'll show myself out."

"My mother + my father condom = MOST AWESOME PERSON ALIVE!"

"Scientists are now saying climate change is ""whatever"" and life is ""bullshit"" and ""Judith left me last night, that's why I'm drunk at work""."

"Some people have difficulty sleeping But I can do it with my eyes closed!"

"The priest and the rabbi So, a priest and a rabbi are talking. The priest says:"" I recently fucked a little boy."" The rabbi responds:"" Out of what?"""

"I'm excited about a black person being on the $20 bill. I always wanted to use black people as currency."