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Joke of the Day
"Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants."
Next Joke
"A man gestures to an empty parking lot... and says, ""This is all asphalt."" Then his ass says, ""Don't blame me."""
"What should you use to make a boat explode? A weapon of mast destruction."
"Do you like dragons? Because i'm going to be dragon these nuts across your face!"
"A coworker wouldn't stop bragging about her upcoming trip to Hawaii, so I emailed her a bunch of pictures of plane crashes."
"If you've seen one shopping centre... You've seen a mall."
"shops have changed so much. In my day you could go in with a pound and get a bag of crisp and a magazazine now days they have cameras"
"Whats the difference between a brown noser and a shithead? Depth Perception"
"I decided not to let C into my fancy club. It lacks class."
"What is the definition of masurbation? Coming unscrewed"