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Joke of the Day
"What's the difference between a herpes and jacuzzi? i let women know that i have a jacuzzi"
Next Joke
"My 19 yo cousin told me this one What did Euler find in the toilet? Natural log"
"We only use 10% of our brains because the other 90% is busy regretting saying ""You too!"" to a waiter after he said ""Enjoy your meal."""
"Don't be an ass, be an arse. Do it with class."
"""It started out with a Kiss, how did it end up like this?""- Me, after eating an entire bag of Hershey's chocolate."
"My roommate is 3 days younger than me so ive gotten in the habit of saying ""when i was your age.."" and then describing what i did 3 days ago"
"The government has officially replaced all measurements of time with fruit. More news at banana."
"Q: How can you tell when you've passed an elephant? A: Your eyes are watering and you can't get the seat to go down."
"*delivers baby* *delivers baby* *delivers baby* *delivers baby* *delivers baby* Nurse 1: I'm exhausted. Nurse 2: I hate Labor Day."
"I used to hate the square root of -1 but then I realized I was just imagining things."