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Joke of the Day

"If software developers made cars They would cost $500, get 200 miles per gallon, and once a year would explode. Killing everyone inside."

"Hi, I'm a zombie, can I eat you out?"

"""I'm a very private person"" - people who are on back to back reality shows"

"I'm no Exorcist, but i did scare the hell out of someone once."

"Do you want to hear a construction joke? Sorry, I am still working on it."

"My extra sensitive toothpaste doesn't like it when I use other toothpastes."

"RT this if you like to repeat what other people say"

"Masturbation Just got back from competing in the Blindfolded Masturbation World Championship No idea where I came."

"I cut my pizza into 7 bits I haven't had a byte yet"

"I told my girlfriend her bond villain nickname is Winter Snow... Because she is so flakey I then called her Nigerian Prince for not delivering on her promises. True story"