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Joke of the Day

"Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear."

"I don't hate anyone. I just don't like people."

"What's the difference between a porcupine and a ferrari? The porcupine has pricks on the outside."

"Did you hear about the kleptomaniac with no sense of humor? He took everything literally"

"What's better than roses on a piano? Tulips on your organ"

"*buying teacher's gifts* 7: Mrs. J said she hates candles. Me: {recalling mountain of homework every night} Pumpkin Spice Candle it is then!"

"A wizard named Ifa, who became leader of the Dothraki tribe People call him Wiz-Khal-Ifa"

"Santa goes to Ethiopia. Starving kid says in his winding breath: *Santa presents...!* Santa says: **Santa doesn't gift children who doesn't eat properly!**"

"Just watched The Hobbit: The Battle to Stay Awake for What Felt Like Five Hours."

"I asked the waitress if she wanted a good tip and a quickie. She said: Just the tip."