224893
Joke of the Day
"Keanu Reeves, sure, but then Keanu comes back a rittle bit rater."
Next Joke
"The best & funniest part of The Big Bang Theory.., is when I get the remote to change the channel."
"A girl phoned me the other day and said ""Come on over, there's nobody home."" I went over. Nobody was home"
"What do you call? What do you call nuts on a wall? Walnuts What do you call nuts on a chest? Chestnuts What do you call nuts on a chin? A dick in the mouth"
"Favorite all time cooking shows: 1. Iron Chef 2. Hell's Kitchen 3. Breaking bad"
"I have a vegan girlfriend... and she's nice and all, but sometimes I think she just looks at me like a piece of carrot"
"How did Dairy Queen get pregnant? Burger King forgot to wrap his Whopper."
"Why is it so hard to explain metaphors to a kleptomaniac? Because they always take things... Literally"
"Remember: You are like a snowflake. Beautiful. Unique. White. Only here for a short time. People get mad when you sit on their cars."
"Trump & Hillary Hillary hides her emails because she has Trumps nudes."