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Joke of the Day

"missed connection: you walked by my house and saw me drinking from the hose. please respond with the hose color so I know it's you"

"What happens on 420 in Saudi Arabia A lot of people get stoned"

"I want a family beach vacation. Hubby wants a family ski vacation. Hubby showing kids video of tsunamis. But 2 can play. Avalanche anyone?"

"While making small talk with my wife's doctor I asked him what he does for a living because I am amazing at human interaction."

"My jokes are like straws They suck."

"Why do black people have long legs? Because they're negros"

"You gotta go for personality, guys.... They'll ALL look like grandma someday,,"

"How can you tell your girlfriend is getting fat?? .. She fits into your wife's clothes"

"When I refer to old relatives passing away I never say ""RIP"" because I don't wants them to rest. I want them to Zumba."

"A man was arrested for marrying two ugly women... He was charged with pigamy."