224241

Joke of the Day

"My wife and I play trivia pursuit a lot, it's where she ignores me until I correctly guess what I did wrong."

"I like my coffee like I like my women.. Thrown into a burlap sack and transported across the border."

"My 3 year-old wanted to help me cook breakfast... ...but she wasn't eggsperienced enough."

"What's the difference between my virginity and the Apple Airphones? Losing my virginity wouldn't cost me as much."

"Which war had the most overweight soldiers? VietNOMNOMNOM"

"I bet the Americans feel really stupid now. They've spent millions fighting ISIS when all they had to do was change their profile picture."

"You would never know I had a college degree if you saw how many times I tried to push when it says pull."

"What an age we live in... ... when a family of billionaires moves into government subsidized housing previously occupied by black people."

"How did Jim Henson die? He Kermitted suicide"

"Why are eggs so good at humor? Because they have running yolks."