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Joke of the Day

"If I make you breakfast in bed, all I need is a simple thank you Not all this ""how the hell did you get in my house"" and ""I'm calling the cops"" business"

"Don't let people tell you that life after college is nothing but being poor and tired. It's 100% true, but it's more fun if it's a surprise."

"Keep your friends' cake and your enemies' cake."

"You strike me as one of those people who show up and debunk all the fun in the last 2 minutes of an otherwise scintillating UFO TV program."

"I'm tired.... I hear there is a nap for that."

"I am so smart and good at arguments.. I am so smart and good at arguments, that in the end I end up beating myself!"

"What do cows read at the breakfast table? The moospaper!"

"What did one wall say to the other? Meet me in the corner!"

"Steve Jobs will be back He's an Android afterall."

"Q: What do you call a man who marries an old ugly and poor woman? A: Desperate!"