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Joke of the Day

"I treat my women like I treat my cereal Spoon first to get it wet, then eat it. P.S. I love fat chicks."

"What do you call an illegal wristwatch trade? A wrist-ky buisness."

"Every birthday is a surprise party after you turn 80."

"What do you call a dinosaur FBI agent? A pteredacted."

"I said goodbye to everyone at a party and then mistakenly walked into a closet and was too embarrassed to walk back out so I live here now."

"Most of my workday is me thinking what my couch is doing right now."

"What's pink and retarded? A Flamongo."

"Q: How does a blonde interpret 6.9? A: A 69 interrupted by a period."

"Theres 365 days until halloween and people ALREADY have their decorations up."

"A cannibal, a terrorist and a rapist walk into a bar... in their jail cell."