2231

Joke of the Day

"The word 'nothing' is a palindrome. 'Nothing' reversed is 'Gnihton' which also means nothing"

"Counting to ten after someone pisses you off gives you time to think of somewhere to bury them."

"Did you know: the average American spends 8,000 years of their life refilling Brita water pitchers."

"Yo mama so fat ... ... last christmas I took a picture of her. It's still printing."

"I don't trust anyone who doesn't count their donuts before leaving a drive-thru."

"Naming my favorite books is like choosing which of my kids I love more! In that I have a full list right here, do you have a pencil ready"

"In the updated version of The Sixth Sense, Bruce Willis figures out he's dead when he sees his name trending on Twitter."

"""Whenever one door closes, another opens."" ""Wow, you must be very optimistic about life."" ""No, I live in a haunted house."""

"If you make fun of Rod Blagojavich's hair, there'll be hell toupee."

"A JokeExplainBot walks into a bar... The bartender says ""Hey! We don't serve robots in here."" The JokeExplainBot replies menacingly, ""Oh, you will... Someday, you will."""