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Joke of the Day

"What did one earthquake say to the other? It's not my fault."

"[E] open box [empty]"

"So I was out for a walk with my Grandpa... My grandpa had altzhiemer's disease, and we were going for a little walk when all of the sudden....... (Classic comedy)"

"There's that moment when you put your steak on the grill and your mouth waters all over from that amazing smell... Do you vegans feel the same when you mow the grass?"

"If you wanna go and take a ride with me with three women in the floor with the goat cheese."

"Stay out of my dreams if you're not going to be there when I open my eyes"

"This guy in an overcoat walks up to two old nuns on a bench and opens up his coat to reveal he's completely naked underneath. One of the nuns has a stroke. The other one couldn't reach"

"H:""Where'd you get those shoes?"" Me:""I've had these for years. Is that a new grill I saw?"" H:""Nope just cleaned the old one"" *Marriage lies"

"German women love me... I'm a ladies man. I saw this fine German woman. I didn't even have to chat her up for her to hastily give me her number. It was easy to remember 999 9999."

"I just left my job. I couldn't work for that man after what he said to me. What did he say? You're fired."