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Joke of the Day

"What do ants drink? Tea. It's an ant tea joke."

"What do you call a cow with epilepsy? Beef jerky!"

"What do snakes have on their bath towels ? Hiss and Hers !"

"Those magical three words you've been waiting so long to hear. Red, or white?"

"Poor old lady!! I saw a poor old lady fall unconscious in the snow today. Well I'm assuming she was poor, she only had 86p in her purse."

"Went to my psychologist and told him I feel like a pack of cards. He said hell deal with me later"

"I broke up with my boyfriend. He was such a jerk. What a goat! -Don't you mean pig? No. He tried to eat my couch!"

"Perspective is everything. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the live lobsters in the ship's galley."

"Matthew 11, Luke 9 and John 12... ...are just three of the boys Father O'Reilly has to stay at least 50 yards from."

"If one is an expert at tying knots, one does knot simply."