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Joke of the Day
"Do you guys like Civil War jokes? Because General Lee I don't find them funny."
Next Joke
"Why are electric trains like a mother's breasts? They were both designed for the kids but it's the fathers who are always playing with them."
"Friends: Let's roll a fatty Me: I have a name guys and pls don't"
"I can guess what state you are from with a single question! What state are you from?"
"Wife: He's always lying about his celebrity connections.. Therapist: Is this true? Me: Just wait til Sonic The Hedgehog hears this bullshit."
"YOU ASKED IF YOU COULD PET HER, NOT IF SHE BITES, MEGAN."
"CNN News ""Tree Falls On Bank"" Does anyone know what branch?"
"When other parents at the playground ask me things about my baby I say, ""I don't know. I just kidnapped her."""
"If laziness were an olympic discipline... ... I'd want to finish 4th so I wouldn't have to climb the medals podium..."
"There is no snooze button on a dog that wants to go out for a piss."