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Joke of the Day
"A man died in a grain silo... He ran himself to death, trying to find a corner to pee in."
Next Joke
"and so, the squirrel who forgot where he buried his acorn became the squirel who planted this tall beautibful oak tree"
"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a big fall. All the kings and all the kings men..   had scrambled eggs for breakfast again."
"I have a lot of jokes about the unemployed. But none of them works."
"[Terrorist tears open undercover FBI agent's jacket] Terrorist: FBI? Agent: uhhh Terrorist: hey guys this dude is a Female Body Inspector"
"Woman:""Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"" Man: ""Either way love, we'll be having sex in a minute"""
"What's the difference between a Catholic priest and acne. Acne waits until you're thirteen to come on your face."
"If I had to guess at the religion of Daniel Day Lewis... I would probably have to say Methodist   [What are the rules of Daniel Day Lewis?!](http://imgur.com/gallery/NDOov4L)"
"I like my women how I like my buscuits Covered in semen."
"DATE: gonna grab my jacket and brb. you look great by the way ME (whispering to my suit made of chameleons): hell yeah keep it up you guys"