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Joke of the Day

"COP: u were swerving a lot so i have to conduct a sobriety test ME: ok COP: lets get taco bell ME: no COP: text ur ex ME: no COP: ok ur good"

"Why are people not right in the head? Because on the left side of the brain there is nothing right and on the right side there is nothing left!"

"Statistically speaking... 6/7 dwarfs aren't happy."

"How do you know when there is an elephant under your bed ? When your nose touches the ceiling !"

"What do you call a boring meme about some internet drama that you don't care about? Dramameme."

"A Man Loses His Eye in a Fight The first thing he says to his eye doctor is: ""Eye didn't see it coming."""

"(NSFW) Last night I tried to hit the ceiling with my jizz, but just like every night, I was unsuccessful. It was one of my many shortcomings"

"Terminate an unwanted conversation with someone you haven't seen for years with the words, ""Wow. You've aged badly..."""

"Why can I never be a doctor? Because I don't have any patients"

"Q: What do you call kinky sex with chocolate? A: S&M&M."