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Joke of the Day

"I'd imagine homeless people aren't the biggest fans of little dogs wearing sweaters."

"*puts dreamcatcher above bed* ""Sure hope this works"" *wakes up in the middle of the night* *Ryan Gosling is stuck in dreamcatcher* ""YES"""

"Did you hear the story about the frog? It was ribbeting."

"[breakfast in hell] STALIN: Toast is burnt POL POT: Eggs are rotten HITLER: I hate the juice STALIN: Oh here we go HITLER: I said JUICE"

"Why didn't the terminator upgrade to windows 10? I asked him and he said, ""I still love vista, baby!"""

"A woman is a lot like an oven You gotta warm her up first but then you can put your meat inside."

"What do you call a cow that just gave birth? DECALFINATED"

"What did the sadist do to the masochist? nothing."

"America is in the labor room right now... Within 24 hours we will know if it's a boy or a girl."

"Love is not a game. If you think it is, then you're not playing it right."