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Joke of the Day

"What did the sadist do to the masochist? nothing."

"Die Hard What happens when you overdose on viagra"

"Quit smoking is so easy I quit at least a thousand times already Edited :D"

"[before sex] HER: did you bring protection? ME: heck ya I did *slowly reaches into back pocket and pulls out nunchucks*"

"A bird gets hit and killed by a baseball The umpire and coroner agreed to call it foul play."

"Just think if the kids that made Frosty the Snowman brought two carrots that day."

"I can't afford Ugg boots, so I just never shave below the knee to create the illusion that I'm wearing them."

"What do they call me in prison? Mitochondria, cause I'm the powerhouse of the cell"

"What do you call a dinosaur with one eye Doyouthinkhesawus. What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes Dontthinkhesawus."

"I just want to have the poker face of a toddler that tells you that they didn't poop their pants."