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Joke of the Day

"First you can't smoke and now you get banned for grinding up on other patrons. It's like, why even bother getting drunk at the zoo anymore?"

Next Joke
 
"Karma is like 69. You get what you give."
"How to bargain with your wife Me: Can I get a motorcycle? Wife: No. Me: Can. I get a boat? Wife: NO! Me: Can I get a blowjob? Wife: (sighs) Is it a BIG boat?"
"How to you tell a naval officer from and RAF officer on an aircraft carrier? The naval officer is trying to feed bread to the helicopters!"
"Donald Sterling saying racism is not a problem is like mosquitoes saying malaria is not a problem."
"If Socrates had been a woman, he would've said: All I know is that I have all these clothes, but I have nothing to wear."
"A man's wife gets angry about him switching to bitcoins He says ""Why don't you switch to bitchcoins?"""
"People are wondering if Caitlin Jenner should be put in male or female prison if she is charged. I think they should send her to a halfway house."
"Lotta single women are getting a ""What's up?"" text right now."
"Haters gonna hate, thermometers gonna thermom"