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Joke of the Day

"My teacher yelled at me for saying ""black paint."" Apparently, in Spanish class we're supposed to say ""pintura negra."""

"We Don't Swerve Blondes Here"

"A girl asked me if I had AIDS... I said: ""Uh, I don't think you can get that from a goat."""

"""Bones?"" I said. ""Is that you?"" ""In the flesh"", it replied."

"Old joke I can dodge a Ford, but can't afford a Dodge..."

"If you don't already know your Miranda rights from watching TV and movies, you're kind of an idiot."

"Did you hear Chewbaca won the NFL MVP his first year in the league? It was a great Wookie season!"

"My wife was so sick this morning... that I had to carry her to the kitchen to make my breakfast."

"Having the option to erase and re-record after having to leave a voicemail is one of my favorite things about life."

"The original Latin name for Monday was Thisshitagain. #littleknownfacts #alsonottrue"