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Joke of the Day

"ISIS Awards Night The 2016 best suicide bomber award goes to Mohammed. Unfortunately Mohammed can't be with us tonight."

"What do you call a blonde in a tree with a brief case? Branch manager."

"What website are the germans least likely to laugh at? Neingag."

"Him: I know your secret Me:*nervously sweating, remembering my Netflix history* Yeah? H: You killed someone M: *relieved* Oh, haha. Yep"

"Bought a new Shakespeare sat-nav - It gets me from A to B or not to B."

"Q: How many perverts does it take to put in a light bulb? A: Just one but it takes the entire emergency room to get it out!"

"If cars where fueled by bullshit most of your tanks would always be full."

"What do you call a policeman on fire? Bacon."

"How do you make estrogen? Don't pay her."

"My wife said she was divorcing me because I am obsessed with masturbation. I told her to go fuck herself"