218923

Joke of the Day

"Oh, your pet loves you more than anyone else? No shit, if you controlled when I ate I'd be obsessed with you too."

"What do you call a huge pair of tits you want to see but never get a chance to? Cliffhangers"

"What do you call a funny pancake? a puncake"

"I pulled my groin the other day.. .. It felt so good, I pulled it one more time."

"Why do they eat snails in France? They don't like fastfood"

"C'mon, I can't be the only one that does kegels to pass the time in meetings"

"My 95 year old grandpa was prescribed viagra... To stop him pissing on his slippers and rolling out of bed."

"Pretty soon the only place you will be able to buy a Confederate flag will be the black market. Oh the irony."

"On Family Guy, why is the Griffen's internet so slow? They only have one meg."

"Benjamin Button Started off dead Violets are blue Roses are red"