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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between a cockpit and a condom? you can only get one prick into a condom -Fight Club"

"""Dad, why isn't there chocolate meatloaf?"" - my brilliant 3 year old son Patrick"

"One day Facebook, YouTube and Twitter will merge. It will be called YouTwitFace."

"I don't know where I stand on abortion. I like killing babies, but I don't like giving women a choice."

"Girl: Saying hot is disrespectful. You should say 'beautiful' instead. Me: Ok. Me: Can you please pass the beautiful sauce?"

"Did you hear about the condom that flew across the bedroom? It was PISSED OFF!"

"When taking the SAT, write ""Chuck Norris"" for every answer. You will score over 8000."

"What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke?"

"I suffer from paranoia and procrastination. Everyone is out to get me, just not right now"

"What's better than winning a gold medal at the Paralympics? Walking"