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Joke of the Day

"I like my women how I like my wine. Mellow, full bodied, and with a penis . . ."

"My wife's cock crazy... Two licks then she goes nuts."

"When you've got bad hair and a chin zit all you can do is wear a low cut shirt and hope people look you in the tits instead of your face."

"Best part of election night is seeing how fast states tabulate votes and judging the slow ones. What's up, Sloth Carolina?!"

"Sometimes Jesus appears on toast, sometimes pancakes, sometimes waffles. Always on breakfast food. Why? It's the most important meal."

"Pathan Joke *original joke translated into english* Pathan: I want to get married Dad: With who? Pathan: Grandmother *Dad turns angry* Pathan: You married my mother, that's why I want revenge."

"A lawyer walks into a bar... exam. I just thought of this one. Not sure if I'm the first."

"I've been told I'm condescending. (That means I talk down to people.)"

"So a man was reported as having a gun turned out to be an umbrella He was armed and while the umbrella was open rather shady"

"My roommate from California was homesick So I stole his water bottle to make him feel more at home."