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Joke of the Day

"Why does Arnold Schwarzenegger kill all the bugs at his ex girlfriend's house? He's her ex-terminator"

"Why do Native Americans hate snow? Because it's white and settles on their land"

"I just got kicked out of karaoke night for singing ""Danger Zone"" six times in a row... ...they told me I exceeded my maximum number of Loggins attempts"

"U.S. vending machines to begin displaying calorie information to encourage smarter snack choices. Machines' reflective glass surface not doing the trick."

"""You ask."" ""No, you ask!"" ""Will you please ask?"" ""Why can't you ask?"" ""Fine... Hey my FRIEND wants to ask you something!"""

"An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman decided to have a BBQ. The Englishmen brought some meat, the Irishman brought some whiskey and the Scotsman brought some dude from Aberdeen."

"I always get a ""Yes"" from women, but it's usually followed by ""That's him, officer."""

"Actually Jennifer, diamonds are a girls best friend, so technically I slept with your second best friend"

"Why is French person a better team player than a pirate? The pirate says, ""Aye, aye!"" The French says, ""Oui, oui!"""

"Red grape juice is fine obviously but white wine for Eucharist??? just stay home you are clearly not saved"