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Joke of the Day

"So this guy who suffers from premature ejaculation... ...comes out of nowhere"

"I was going to go for a run this morning. Then I remembered I don't run so I put some whiskey in my coffee and sat back down."

"It only took me 20 minutes to get the Christmas tree up this year. It took doctors 6 hours to get it back out again."

"What do you call 10 Ethiopians tied together? A raft"

"If it defies all logic, and makes very little sense then it was probably my idea..."

"What's the worst part about locking your keys in your car outside of an abortion clinic? Going inside to ask for a coat hanger."

"I once got diarrhea on a road trip but I went on, undeterred."

"One i made up for my mexican friends. If a Rabbi blesses food it's kosher. What do you call enchilada sauce bkessed by a priest? A: HOLY MOLE' Thank you, I'll be in r/dadjokes all week!"

"It's so rough where I live ... We don't have Jehova's witnesses, we have Jehova's bystanders (who are like ""We didn't see nothing"")"

"We have enough breakfast items for the toaster now, food scientists. Move on to the car heater vent."