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Joke of the Day

"Drug test Employer- we need to take your drug test to see if there are any drugs in your urine Employee- I'll pass, you won't check my nose right?"

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"Why do computer programmers confuse Halloween with Christmas? Because Oct31 = Dec25"
"When my friend told me to stop acting like a flamingo... ...I just had to put my foot down..."
"I hate finding out I'm arguing with someone who actually knows what they're talking about."
"What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vendor? Make me one with everything. - Danny DeVito from Inside the Actor's Studio"
"People call me ugly until they see my wallet Then they call me poor"
"What type of pants do Japanese people wear? Nihon-jeans (Nihon-jin)"
"There was a contest for the best pun. I submitted ten puns. I hoped that one would win, but... No pun in ten did."
"Meteorologists always have their heads in the clouds But gastroenterologists take shit seriously"
"What do you call a root beer in a square glass? Beer"