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Joke of the Day

"There was a contest for the best pun. I submitted ten puns. I hoped that one would win, but... No pun in ten did."

"The iPhone 7 is an of all trades Sorry, I meant ""jack of all trades"" but there's no more jack."

"HOLLYWOOD They wanted me for the lead role in Twelve Years a slave but id only been married for 10"

"""Hi yes I'd like to attempt the Cheeseburger challenge"" ""Very good sir"" [ripped as hell cheeseburger runs out of the kitchen & bodyslams me]"

"[At dinner] Daughter: Daddy, how much of this meatball is meat? Me: Probably like 90% D: So it's 10% balls? Me: *spits out food*"

"What fish tastes great with peanut butter? Jellyfish"

"What did 0 say to 8 ? Nice belt"

"Am I a better husband or father? Well let's just say I never fantasize about being with other kids."

"How do you tell if the stage is level? The drummer is drooling from both sides of his mouth."

"How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? They don't, they beat the room for being black."