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Joke of the Day

"My mate just rang me and said ""what are you doing at the moment?"" I said, ""probably failing my driving test."""

"Saw 8 vasectomy billboards on my 4 hour road trip through Florida yesterday. It's like Florida knows what has to be done to Florida."

"World population will soon pass 7 billion, over twice the people of just 50 years ago, and I can still only find about 3 that I can stand."

"When is Iran not Iran? When it's a rock."

"The 'C word' My girlfriend hates it when I say the ""C word"". This one time, we were watching Spongebob and I'm like ""hey, its 'C word'!"" and shes like ""it's Squidward, you cunt"""

"Do Not Be Racist ..... Do not be racist; be like Mario. He's an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew"

"I used to know a guy who had five legs. His pants fitted him like a glove."

"If you like interracial porn... ...you'll love the next 4 years. Minorities are going to be fucked constantly by an old white man."

"Famous Russian snooker player Inov the red"

"What would you call a set of old school rapper emojis? Em-OGs"